OK, I’ll be honest. I don’t truly know if the end of my bad feelings is near, however it does seem like I have been having a few more good days recently. I still haven’t been able to string a bunch of good days together (with the exception of our weekend trip to visit my bio family), but the brighter days do seem to signal that things are on the right track.
Perhaps incongruously for someone with depression, I have always been–and perhaps remain–an optimist. Which is partly why depression can be so frustrating. It seems like despite my sunny outlook, reality has a way of rising up and smacking me in the face.
Coincidentally or not, last night and into this morning we had a bit of a snowstorm here. A few days ago it was a beautiful day, a balmy 70 degrees or so. But nature has a way of reminding me that I do live in South Dakota after all. Usually we are done with the snow by the middle to the end of March. At least we didn’t have it as bad as northern parts of the state that had 9 inches of the white stuff. I should take a cue from others, however. Rather than complain, there were pictures on the news of kids that had made snow Easter Bunnies.
But in my metaphor filled consciousness, what I equate this last blast of snow to is the last bit of depression hanging on to my mind. While I know that depression will likely stick around long after kids are out of school and we are playing in the back yard in our shirt sleeves, it gives this optimist something of a visualization. So, as the snow melts today, I am heading out with Lovely Wife, Little Guy and Baby Girl to let spring feelings creep back into my psyche.
And while I am optimistic that this is the final blast of winter, the realist part of my brain reminds me that it snowed on April 30 a few years ago.
SATURDAY FUN: Music favorites
Although my music tastes usually favor Country, Blues, and Folk, it is quite eclectic. So on a day where I need a little pick me up, here is a classic by They Might Be Giants: