Tag Archives: fitness

Blog Reboot

It’s been over a year, and I have decided to pick up blogging once more. More than anything, this has to do with keeping myself accountable for my own well being.  I am still dealing with my depression, but I have decided that I need to work on physical fitness.  The other day I got on the scale and was horrified at what it was telling me: 309.  A mere three years ago, I was around 240.  That is insane folks.  There are reasons (excuses, really) for how this got out of control, but I can’t help but feel that it has a major bearing on my mood.

 So I am shifting gears as of today.  I’ll still mention mental health in passing, but this is all about losing weight, exercising more, eating better, and becoming healthier.  There is more to come, I promise.  Expect a visual makeover, for one.  

In the meantime, I will leave you with this.  Today is Wednesday, and I “started” on Sunday.  I have not killed myself exercising, nor starved myself.  Instead I am getting back into shape slowly, and eating sensibly (more on both later.) The result: according to my handy dandy app, I have lost 7.2 pounds so far.  Eat your hearts out, Biggest Losers.


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How am I doing? Ask my dog.

If your dog is fat, it is said, you need more exercise.  I guess in our case, this aphorism doesn’t quite hold water.  Although I do in fact need more exercise, my dog happens to be in tip top shape.  In fact, sometimes I worry that he is too skinny.  The vet assures me that it probably only seems that way because the majority of dogs out there are overweight.

I’m not quite sure how he does it.  We always keep his bowl full, so he eats whenever he wants.  Not to mention, he serves as a breakfast and dinnertime cleanup crew underneath the kiddos’ booster chairs.  I am fairly certain that he sleeps most of the day when Lovely Wife and I are away to work.   The last time that I took him in for his shots he had lost about a pound and a half.  Pretty significant when you only weigh 18 lbs in the first place. 

What his real talent lies, however, is in matching my mood.  I started noticing when he was a puppy that on days I was feeling good he would run around and play and be full of energy.  If I came home in a foul mood and plop down on the couch, he would snuggle up next to me and lay his head on my leg, a forlorn look on his face.  Recently he seems to have been a little more down.  We have considered getting another dog to keep him company during the day.  However, we have doggie-sat my parents pooch on occasion, and I am pretty sure that he goes about his normal routine. 

I visited the psychiatrist today, who reminded me that exercise is a good way to help with depression.  Exercise helps release those feel good endorphins.  So in our case I think that perhaps we need to make an amendment to the old axiom.  If your dog is depressed, you need more exercise.

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I figured that I should at least do a weekly update on my physical fitness.  The exercise isn’t going too well, which is a little stressful as the upcoming Bike MS is weighing heavily in the back of my mind.  I can report that Lovely Wife and I have placed at least a temporary moratorium on eating out, and it is already paying dividends.  This week I weighed in at 269 lbs.  I will gladly take a four pound a week loss.

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TUESDAY FUN – Photo Favorites

I took the following photo on our honeymoon.  Lovely Wife and I took a cruise and one of our destinations was the small Caribbean island of Dominica.  I had never heard of it before.  We were pleasantly surprised with Dominica.  Being less of a tourist destination than a lot of Caribbean nations, there really wasn’t much to offer in the way of beaches or shopping.  We elected to take an excursion that would take us on a hike through the rain forest to view a waterfall and then stop at a smaller waterfall with a pool that we could swim in.  Along the path I spotted this little fellow, almost begging me to take a picture.


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Filed under depression, dog, fitness

Growing old before your time…


I never realized that depression would feel quite like this until I was deep enough into it that I realized that is where I am.  I had admitted to myself on particularly bad days that I was depressed, but I didn’t think I was “clinically depressed”, whatever that was.  I’ve never felt the deep pits of despair, never even considered ending it all.

But all of a sudden I realized that I just wasn’t interested in anything. Going out, being with friends, reading, writing, playing music, listening to music, exercising, cooking, photography–all those things that used to help define who I am just didn’t seem all that much interesting.

Luckily I’ve had my family with me–Lovely Wife, Little Guy, Baby Girl–who do still matter.  In particular, Lovely Wife has been so supportive in helping me realize what was wrong and facilitating getting help for me.  Long after many spouses may have thrown up their hands in exasperation, she is taking those vows seriously.

Along with that jerk Depression, his good buddy Anxiety is always there with him working in tandem.  It seems like whenever I have a handle on one of them, the other decides to crank himself up to sabotage my mood. 

As of today, I am starting this blog as a journal on my journey back to health.  I hope to pick up some readers along the way–those of you that can help or encourage, or perhaps be helped and encouraged by me.


A few years ago, when Lovely Wife and I were a newly minted married couple, I had discovered the joy of working out–specifically running.  I used to think that “Runner’s High” had to have been an oxymoron.  But that summer, as the days went by, the miles piled up, and the scale went down, I learned to really take enjoyment from the activity.  Then I suffered a bout with back spasms, and have been off the exercise rails pretty much since.   Messieurs Depression and Anxiety haven’t helped the cause.

So part of my journey will also include physical fitness.  There are many boogey men that getting in shape will help me keep locked away in the closet.  The word “Moobs” comes to mind.  So does the phrase “Type II Diabetes”.  In order to be accountable in this area, there has to be a quantifiable measurement, so *gulp* here goes: 273 lbs.

As part of my total fitness goal, I have signed up for Bike MS: Pedal the Plains.  Multiple Sclerosis is a disease that affects more than 400,000 Americans.  Not only will the ride help me towards my fitness goals, but the money raised will be going to a great cause.  I encourage everybody to click on the link in the sidebar to visit my page and make a donation.  If you are in my area, I also welcome you to join my team.


I have decided to always end with something a little less serious.  The subject will change, but expect some common recurring subjects.

One of the things I love is music.  On a great tip I have recently been listening to Ray LaMontagne.  This particular song reminds me of where I am right now. 

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Filed under anxiety, depression, fitness